Hour Glass Half-Full: Gratitude in 2020

How appropriate that I begin my blogging again on the eve of Thanksgiving this year 2020, the craziest roller coaster of a year most of us have seen in our lifetimes. I’ve recently been reflecting on graduate practices. I’ve tried numerous things over the years and I do believe that it’s truly a great practice to change our mindset and outlook on our days, life overall and everyone that we impact.

However, I think gratitude practices kind of get a bad rep. Sometimes gratitude practices get thrown in with the “self-care” movement and seem a little too dreamy for most people. Myself included, and I personally preach self care. I used to feel like sometimes it just seemed a little superficial since we should say were grateful for the certain things in our life that are the obvious ones, right? You know, the big ones overall...health, our family, having a home & food, the things that most of us take for granted that really are things many people in the world would be truly grateful for and don’t have in daily life. So this year I’d like to start a new practice that I’ve heard about recently. I think it’s a great way to focus on my present state and what I want to be focused on in the here and now. Let me know what you think.

“A wise person” said it’s a great practice to have a gratitude list that you use daily, but to not have any repeats for two weeks straight. It sounds pretty simple, but when you start to think about it, it might not be as easy as we’d imagine. I really liked this concept because I use a journal called The Five Minute Journal. I have a paper one as well as the app on my phone because I’m kind of crazy & my mind goes back-and-forth. Sometimes having the paper one right at my bedside is perfect, and when I’m not in the practice of using it there I have my phone to jump on whenever I feel ready. It doesn’t matter how you do it just do what works for you and just try to create that consistency. 

In the journal there’s an inspirational message that welcomes you each day. You write three things that you’re grateful for, three things that would make the day great, three things you intend to do and three affirmations. So again, if saying nice things about yourself is something that turns you off just remember this practice is something for YOU...that you deserve! If you don't state it, who will? Talk yourself up lady! It’s a mindset reset. ❤️

Back to the repeats...

The reason I really like this no repeats for two weeks concept is because a lot of times I want to put something that I’m grateful for on my list but I feel like those general big ones need to be on the gratitude list every day. But they can be there in your heart, no one is judging your list. No one is saying your list is or isn’t good enough. Why do we (I) play these mental games with ourselves? I need reminders to take me out of that mindset. The no repeat concept is great because it lets you be in the current day, in the current mindset of something that you’re appreciative of right now. They might not seem as big as other things, but it’s OK because it's something that you see beauty in for that moment & made you feel good. It’s those small daily things that are actually big things, creating a full depth of gratitude and positivity in your life, changing your mindset for the better. Not just saying “I do a gratitude practice” & yes I am grateful for the big things. 

This year I’ve really taken a look at the negative things that have happened and recently been listening to some more “wise people” that helped me realize how to be grateful for the things that don’t seem positive. Finding gratitude for the struggles and the things that we overcome as moments of gratitude & opportunities for growth. That sounds crazy because there have been major decisions that have been made this year for myself, as well as the entire world, and most of us have struggled a lot. Many have suffered losses that I'd never wish on anyone, while others have suffered through change and will continue to feel those changes for years to come. 

It’s not easy, but I’ve learned to try to see the silver lining in the changes, trying to see those moments that help me realize change was really meant to be for me & my family. I'm learning that it’s OK to slow down, to stop to laugh, to (really) look at your kids as they grow, to have arguments about virtual learning, to struggle and also enjoy those times of growth. 

Last night I was reminded about this with a beautiful few moments of chaos making dinner with the kids. One was reading the recipe & directions (a mom win for reading practice) & the other one assembled & cooked the dinner, while I was at the sink doing dishes and laughing a lot! We talked, made some chaos, then laughed, had dance breaks and really listened to each other. It was one of the most beautiful things I have felt in a long time, just us being crazy, silly & chaotic while enjoying each other. Without a “plan” or expectation, time limit or rush, just being together in a way that we really didn’t get to do often enough in the busy, pre-pandemic days. 

It’s these moments, the crazy dinner making, the spontaneous bike rides, the lunch breaks outside in the yard, the family zoom game nights, “real” life learning & the endless movie nights that I am truly grateful for. It’s the time, the time we’ve always had, but often forgotten to see available. It’s the half-full hour glass vs the half-empty one.

So today I am grateful for the little moments in the circus that I (attempt to) run, in some kind of chaotic balance with my husband & supportive extended family. The time I get to cherish through unexpected stuff & life’s changes from here forward.

Is your hour glass half-full? I hope so!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Nicole ❤️